What am I good at? Not climbing. Especially now as I am on the cusp of being fifty years old. My genius is in spatial interpretation and awareness. That’s never made me rich and likely never will. But in exploring the landscape I was born into I have been able to satisfy the cravings of my heart and mind.
I can find the lines. And it’s no bother to me to hike around with a crashpad stuffed with brushes and a saw and loppers. I have passion enough return again and again. Quick after work sessions. Winter weekend outings. I believe eventually I’ll send all of my projects. Maybe naively.
Is this my purpose? Is this something worthwhile in the grand scheme? Am I inscribing into the stone of the universe the petroglyphs of my legacy?
I’m not good at waiting patiently. I end up feeding the urges in my mind with handfuls of exploration. Those urges are hard to satisfy.
I explore in my dreams. I wake up wanting to see something new every day. I make lists. I keep a tally of unsent projects in the back of my mind. Sometimes I can’t stop thinking about them and have to stop whatever I’m doing to chase some new climb. Or find a new arch. Or visit a new overlook. Or holler. Or trail. Or stream.
(Originally posted 12/10/23)
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